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Let It Be

By Sonya Brown

I’m a New Year’s girl, through and through. The forever goal-setter. The master to-do list maker. The one who starts dreaming ambitious dreams before the Christmas tree is even down, ready to hit the ground running on January 1st, with my shiny new planner in tow.⁠

I am not feeling the desire yet. That familiar drive to go go go and do do do seems to be missing from my bones.⁠

If I am honest, I did not savor the holidays this year. I worked right up until Christmas Eve, spent most of December dealing with sick kiddos, prepped our house to be listed for sale, and now as we are already almost two weeks in January and I am finally coming up for air to address the 87 things I’ve been putting off the last three months. Christmas came and went with very little fanfare, a simple whirlwind of wrapping paper and sugar, holiday music and time with family.

And maybe it’s that – Christmas happened too fast. Or maybe it’s just the end of what has felt like (another) incredibly long year. I don’t know why I am feeling this way, a mix of melancholy and frantic, not quite ready to greet January when I am typically sprinting toward her.⁠

I’m tempted to believe I need to wrap this year up in a tidy bow. To clean out the inbox. Declutter the house. Wash all the sheets. Get the budget in order. Back up all the photos. Take down the Christmas tree.⁠

Or, maybe I just … let it be?⁠

Maybe I take this feeling as a sign, a gift, a reminder that it’s okay if I don’t feel ready to great 2022 with wide open arms. Maybe I rest in the peace, the grace, the stillness of sitting on the couch getting lost in a book while snow falls outside. Maybe I take the pressure off January 1st and make all of January my fresh start. Maybe I ease into 2022, like a slow dance. Maybe I aim to set the goals slowly, gradually, intentionally. Maybe I simply step one foot in front of the other, pausing to admire the view. Maybe I don’t sprint this year. Maybe I take my time.⁠

Maybe I leave the Christmas tree up another week.⁠

Maybe I stay here a while longer.

 

 
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